When Loss Changes You | Russell Geoffrey Banks

You have to be so careful when dealing with people who have lost parents, siblings—God forbid—their own child. Because when someone goes through that magnitude of loss, they can never look at the world the same way again. It's different. Of course it is. They won't tolerate your fake energy. They won't play about peace because they've already lost some of the biggest pieces of themselves. 

 

And once you lose someone so close, you have this shift inside of you. It's never going to be the same again. It just can't be. That day, the person you used to be also left. That person is gone now. And everything is different. Even the way you smile is different because, in your head, you start feeling guilty all of a sudden. And you can't love the same. You can't, because you're so worried about losing someone. 

Even the way you breathe is different because that peace and harmony are gone now. They're gone, and they've been replaced with just sadness. And it just doesn't—no matter how many years go by, no matter what happens—that's not going to change, because grief does not leave. It just morphs into some other shape, which maybe you can deal with a little bit better.